6 “I’ll Be At A Bus Stop And People Will Just Start Telling Me About Their Relationship With Their Mothers” and “Total Package Artform”

00:00

Yeah, so I'm a Reiki master. Oh man, I hate that word. It's so weird to say master. I practice racy and one of the ways that I work is with charity. And I go to a charity and work with mothers who have children under the age of five in insecure housing. And I go there every Monday and I share racy sessions with them and they won an award and...

00:30

Part of the prize was getting a documentary made about them. And I think it aired on BBC and they interviewed me and I was a complete idiot. Like they asked me what Reiki was and I just couldn't even like answer. I was just talking in circles. And I just stopped in the middle and I was like, listen, like, I actually do this for a living. Like, I know what this is. I don't know what's happened to me.

00:53

They cut me down to just like saying something about that I really like the charity because they really understand that mothers need more than just like supplies. They need like a place that treats them with dignity and that's it. There was nothing about Ricky. A lot of the spaces that I work at is a space for the moms who have children under the age of five and insecure housing. So the space acts as so many different things. There's like a kitchen. There's a little corner where the moms.

01:23

have case worker meeting a place where the kids are playing. So it's really kind of chaotic. And I just go in a corner and the moms will come and sit for 15 minutes and have a session. And it's my favorite thing because like in this middle, in the middle of this chaos, it's like actually, like I'm finding peace and the moms are finding peace and I'm not charging money. So it just feels like I'm just sitting with my friends like while they're having one.

01:49

hard times knowing that there's no transactional exchange and it feels more pure. It feels so natural. She was unable to run them anymore because she got pregnant. And I said, like, I'll run those volunteering programs. And they used to be once a month, but now it's every week because it's that important to me. Like, I really feel like it does something for me. I can't even explain what it is. I think when you start to want to, like, practice.

02:18

professionally, like for me, it brought out this really rigid side of me that is like, oh, you have to do it this way. They come in, they sit down, I shake their hands, I tell them this, and I do these hand positions, and that's right. And I was really, really like a control freak about it when I first started. And I think working where there's so much other stuff happening at the same time really made me less precious about.

02:47

Reiki and knowing that it doesn't have to be so regimented. It can be just part of something else happening. It doesn't have to be strict and like pure and I don't know how to explain it. When you're like in a clinic space it feels really like different. Like there's not as much breathing room. It doesn't feel natural in you for me.

03:09

Especially when you're charging people and they think, oh, she's a healer or they're going to heal me. There's a lot of responsibility. So when I'm working in a clinic space or the therapy room space, I feel like this kind of care scare comes on. Like, it means like, hi, I'm a professional. Please come in. And I don't like that because for me, race is such a natural everyday part of my life that I don't want to put on the fight.

03:39

professional state. You know what I mean? I just want to be able to walk in a space and just like have Rachel be there with me. Yeah. I think the hardest part for me is like charging what I need to charge. I find that really difficult because I want everyone to be able to come per session, but I also need to pay my bills. What do I charge and do I feel okay with that?

04:06

And so I think that's why I do a lot of low-cost therapy work because I want everyone to be able to access this. That is one of the parts I struggle with. The other is just like, I think maybe like I'm a weirdo. So that like, and I attract weirdos as well. I don't know how to explain. They're like picking it up on me. It doesn't happen in the breaking space. It happens like when I'm walking around. Everyone tells me their problems constantly. Like...

04:34

I will just be out and people will tell me everything that they're struggling with. And I feel also like friends do that as well. There's something about me that people will just tell me their problems. And I don't know how to turn that off, I guess, but I do feel like people feel comfortable or safe with me. So they will just kind of unleash everything on me. I don't know what I'm putting out there that makes people just tell me all their trauma.

05:03

I would just be at a bus stop and people start telling me things about their relationship with their mothers or family things. I'm like, what is happening? I'm just trying to catch the bus. But it is also really nice that people feel that comfortable at the same time.

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05:26

Hey folks, it's Naty. We'll be back with more right after this break.

05:34

the hell is my job? This week I've been working on a film with a choreographer and some dancers and I've been working on this film with them. They already had someone editing the video that they've shot and it wasn't working very well. So I came in to assist with direction and editing and the person in charge, which is the choreographer, told me where the film was at and what they wanted to change.

06:01

And I said, okay, that sounds great. Send me all your stuff. They sent me the stuff. Then I completely ignored everything they said. I turned it into what I thought was maybe a much better film and then sent it back to them. And then they wrote back to me and said, no, can you do what we've asked for, please? What the hell is my job? Like one time I edited a music video. It was directed by a photographer.

06:23

It was for some London rap group and the vision was of a guy, you know, lip-syncing this rap song in an empty art gallery, which is just a white cube. And he's just standing there and just rapping and nothing happens. And when I got the footage, it just looked, it was boring. So I spent a week doing like these layers of crazy animation over the top of it and gave it a lot of energy, which matched the song. And when I sent it to the director, he said, we can never show this to the rappers because they'll definitely like it and they'll definitely want to put it out.

06:53

because it's much better than my vision. So I'm never gonna show them this. Can you please make my vision now? I took quite a long settled downstage in the film world, but it's not like I always wanted to do film specifically. Like in school, I remember like we would do, you would do a keyboard project in the music class, but I also would do the design of the album cover and write out the line and notes with like fake record label information or whatever. So I always like.

07:21

doing stuff that was the total package, maybe is the way to say it. And like, and then doing films is a good medium if you like doing the total package because there's like wardrobe, there's set design, there's photography, there's music, there's acting, there's writing, there's editing, you know, like there's so many disciplines. And then there's like the admin and the paperwork and the producing, you know, like there's just so many aspects to it that it's all inherently a total package art form.

07:49

Which is where the fun is because, you know, I wouldn't want to be a shoe designer unless I also get to be involved in what's the name of the shoe company. And I don't just want to do the shape of the heel on the shoe. You know, you want to decide what the materials are and what the color is and what the box looks like that it comes in and the price point for the mark, who you aiming at. I've never been interested in the cogs. I'm interested in the machine. But I did films for a long time, but I fell out of love with it because there's too much that's out of your control.

08:18

and you want to be a bit more of a control freak if you're interested in the whole package. And so I took a break from films and I did podcasting for a bit, but in narrative format. There were films, but without any of the pictures and you would watch it in your head, a bit like reading a book, you know, you just listen to the podcast and close your eyes and imagine the imagery. And it gave me more ability to control all the aspects and be in charge of the total package.

08:43

and that immediately freed me from making movies. And now I just do stuff for other people. Now I don't really do much of my own stuff, which is a different way, because the initial prompt is not in my control, but I'm still responsible to deliver the whole package. But someone else comes up with the reason why I'm doing it, which is a big freedom, because you don't need to decide why to get up in the morning or why to keep going with this thing that no one's asking for and may never listen to.

09:08

When the pandemic came, a lot of stuff just went online or online became like a more important space because everyone was physically disconnected. So I got an influx of website work during the pandemic. So that's why I didn't do podcasts, although it may have been a good time to do them. But I wanted to do podcasts as a way to get out of the house and go and actually physically see people and interview them and meet them and have a cup of tea without the...

09:36

intrusion of video because the video creates an artificial atmosphere and feeling in everyone immediately because you're on camera, whereas you're anonymous when you're just a voice in many ways so it creates more relaxed and intimate atmosphere. So I wanted to do podcasts because it was a good way to go out and about without the pressure of the camera but then you know everything's online for the pandemic so I just got tons of website work which previously I'd just done as a kind of...

10:03

thing for fun. So I would do websites for friends or whatever, but I never did them quote unquote professionally, but then people started needing websites more. So I started doing more websites and now it's three years later or something. I've lost track of time. If you want to be featured on the show or you know, someone who's perfect for the show, then just fill out the quick and easy form on our website and we'll contact you head to what the hell is my job.com for sign up.